When people realize that my husband is deployed and that this is his second deployment, they will often ask me, "How do you do it? And with five children?" My answer first is simply God's grace. I could not do this without His strength. Oftentimes I tell my husband that I am not a good military wife. I don't mean that in terms of fighting against what it is my husband has felt called to do. I mean that in the sense of my heart struggling so desperately with the separations that are inevitable in the military. I did not marry my husband to be faced with multiple separations, but rather to be his help meet...one working right alongside him to raise and nurture the children the Lord has blessed us with.
Having said that though, I realize that our view of God's will for our lives is not always His will for our lives. Right now, He has called my husband to be in the military. Because of that, my calling is to be his help meet at the moment from a distance, but only in miles, not in heart or mind. He is still the head of our home, no matter how many miles away he is from us. I am grateful that he trusts me in the area of running things while he is gone, but I am always making decisions based on what I know to be how he would lead the home if he were here. If there is ever anything that comes up that would make me question how he would feel about a matter, we wait until he can give us instruction on that issue. Being separated from him does not negate his leading in our home.
One week may not seem like a lot...especially given the fact that a year has 52 of them! But, it is evident of the fact that life continues to tick by, one second, minute, hour, and day at a time. In the big picture, life is fleeting. When we are away from those we love, it can seem to drag by mercilessly. But, God still has a plan for me each and every day. And it is my responsibility to find out what that is one day at a time and to simply do it. I cannot look at the whole picture and count down from these great number of days. I, instead, take one second, one minute, one hour, one day and yes, one week at a time. I think of how I can be productive today...now, what it is God wants me to be doing? Then, one day slips by, then another, then another, and then a week is behind us and I begin praying for next week's goals. As Charles Spurgeon once said, "Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength. "
Tomorrow is Easter Sunday...a day to celebrate the resurrection of our Lord. Can you imagine the pain of separation those at the foot of the cross must have felt when they watched our Lord die so painfully? The hopelessness...the emptiness...the tears...seeing him bruised, beaten, mocked, spit upon...oh the precious Lamb of God! Then what glorious joy! When that wonderful morning broke and Christ arose! He has given us hope...life...joy. And when I am feeling sad, lonely, pain...I remember that He felt all of that first and most...and it is because of what He did that I can keep on going...one second, one minute, one hour, one day...and yes, even one week at a time. Bless the Lamb of God that takes away the sins of the world! And my darling husband, wherever you are right now...know my heart is ever with you and when I worship this Sunday...I will be praying for you and thanking my God that we can celebrate His resurrection together in spirit even if not in body!