Friday, February 12, 2010

Waiting, Waiting, Waiting

It is funny how things can change in such a small amount of time isn't it?  One of my favorite movies is Anne of Avonlea.  For those of you that have seen it, can you remember the scene where Anne is sitting on the porch with Marilla near the end of the movie?  I can't remember the exact quote but the conversation goes a little like this.  Anne is describing how she can't help riding high on the wings of anticipation and how that feeling almost pays for the thud when things don't go as planned.  Then Marilla makes the comment that she would choose to go through life without the flying and the thud.  Well, true confessions here...I am a Marilla Cuthbert in that area!  And yet, I find myself experiencing more thuds in these past two weeks than I care to even count.  My husband is now working somewhere on the 10th or 11th let down with times and dates and planes and whatever else is keeping him from leaving the desert.  It has been an emotional roller coaster for the both of us.  We have soared on the wings of anticipation and hit the ground with a resounding thud day after day after day.  He has called with the "sure thing this time," only to have something like this..."Well, we were supposed to come home Super Bowl Sunday but there were enough guys that didn't want to miss the ballgame so we didn't fly."  Okay, don't even get me started on that one.  I was always a little down on the whole sports craze...this only fuels the fire.  Then there was night before last.  The ABSOLUTE sure sure that my husband got rid of things he still needed there because he couldn't take it with sure the plane was sure...and yet, once again at the last minute, the plane was once again diverted for some reason, some other time, and we now go on waiting, waiting, waiting.  Somehow it was easier knowing that there was not this "hope" out there that it could be any day now.  When it wasn't like this, I could wrap my mind around it, handle it and move on.  But the way this plays with my emotions has been quite exhausting.  So, we thought, okay...maybe he can come home for his 2 week visit and then go back and stay with the men until time for all of them to come home.  We just want to see him.  But, even that is an impossibility now.  Apparently, when you have gone long enough, you can't take your R&R time.  So, out of hundreds of husband is like one of only three  from his battalion that have yet to have time back in the states with their family.  Do I know that this is under God's control?  Yes, I do.  Do I know He has a purpose for this?  Yes, I do.  Do I know He works all things for good for those that love Him?  Yes, I do.  But, I also know that Jesus understands our pain.  Remember when Lazarus had just died?  Jesus knew that this was for a divine purpose.  He knew Lazarus would not remain in that grave, that he was using this very moment to show the glory of God.  He knew this was for everyone's good...and yet, Jesus wept. I find that amazing and comforting!  Jesus wept when He had everything under control.  It was all going according to His Sovereign purpose.   But yet, He understood the loss and the pain and all the human feelings that go with great disappointment.  And I know and thank God that He understands mine too. 

Monday, February 8, 2010

The State of Today's Church

This message is not just about the state of today's church, but rather the need for brokenness in our lives over sin.  This is just one part.  If it touches your heart, watch the rest of it on you tube.  Dr. Voddie Baucham is a favorite preacher/author of ours. 

Monday, February 1, 2010

Home Happenings

It's been too long since I posted some pictures of the children, so I thought I would show you all these while I catch you up on what has been going on here at the Fowler home.  We are still waiting on confirmation for my dh to come home.  I probably won't get more than 12 to 24 hours notice.  How's that for preparing, huh?  But, since not knowing means he is safer, I am fine with that.  I just keep holding on waiting to hear "that" phone call. 

I don't discuss times and dates with the younger four children.  They only know that Daddy is coming home sooner than expected.  I have two birthdays coming up in February.  Julia (in the first picture) will turn four years old.  And Josiah (4th picture will turn nine).  Of course, both of them want their Daddy there for the celebration and it gets hard trying to explain that we cannot count on him being there.  They do occasionally ask how much longer...I try to tell them soon, but how soon, I have no idea!  By the way, the picture above is of Joel, my five year old.
This is Joanna, my six year old.  She will turn seven in March and this week she will be starting second grade phonics and reading.  That will be exciting for her to share that news with her Daddy when he gets home. 
Josiah, my soon to be nine year old and lover of all things Legos!  He is reading on his own just for pleasure so much more and that is a joy to see. 
Joy, now thirteen and taller than I am!  She is such a big helper.  She is my crafter.  Below are some of the projects she has recently done.
This is a little softie animal that she hand sewed.  Cute huh?
I taught her the beginning stitches to crochet and then got her a book for the more advanced things.  Here are some granny square blocks, a snowflake she did and some flowers she crocheted.  The thread is from her collection for her embroidery.  She taught herself that.  And she really does a beautiful job. 
As far as other things going on around here...remember when I showed you all the picture of my wounded toe sometime back?  Well, guess what?  I did it again.  And this time, I am pretty sure I broke it.  I can feel these lumps in places that I never felt before!  It has been extremely painful and I have had to wear thick socks with my houseshoes to help protect it.  What a way to great my husband when he returns!  That has put a little damper on my deep clean projects, but I am still decluttering and working on simplifying our lives and home.  I will keep you all informed when dh comes home for good.  Please continue to keep us in your prayers.  Until next time!