It seems as though things have gotten harder these past few days, instead of easier. It is as if one goes through emotional stages during separation. The idea of how long it will be before Daddy gets home is just beginning to sink into the hearts and minds of the children. Day follows day follows day without Daddy walking through the door. We haven't even eaten at the big table...preferring to stay in the kitchen because the big table reminds us even more of the empty seat at the head. Evenings are incredibly lonely. Daddy is not there to play his special games. He always has a way of making even the seemingly mudane tasks of life seem spectacular. He always made us laugh. I miss that so very much. I could use a good laugh right now. It is heartbreaking not to hear him lead us in devotionals every night.
I am tired...spiritually, emotionally and physically. But, I know I am not the only one that has ever experienced heartache. Life brings heartache of one kind or another to all of us. Anyone who reads this is either experiencing some now, has already in the past, and will most definitely experience some more in the futrue if we live long enough! It is at times like this I ask myself...what do I do with this heartache? I find that caring for sick children around the clock, homeschooling, cooking, cleaning, etc. can cause me to easily miss my time with God. Isn't it easy sometimes to neglect the most important thing because all those other things are so urgent? But, it is in neglecting the important, that I see how I fail in accomplishing the urgent. No matter how many things I check off my to-do list, they are never done as well, or in as sweet a spirit as when I make time to spend with God. So, I run to the One who gives me strength in the time of such emotional and physical turmoil.